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1. |
interlude 1
01:02
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2. |
no you don't
04:11
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no you don't, no you won't
play the part of him
he taught it when you were two
far gone too begin
to unlearn what you thought was true
so you don't
and you won't
and you will not live
outside of the him you knew
lead your favorite hymns
their words don't mean much to you
(won't abandon you, can't get out of your mind?)
so you don't
and you won't
so you lie sometimes
play cool you'll like you're only you
like you aren't inside
an outline he drew for you
how-now if you are him can i say i know you?
or me or anyone in truth?
if you don't
then you won't
play the part of it
the lines that you knew you knew
you would not forget
its safe but its easy too
say you don't
hear the phone
feel your fury rise
unbidden, untamed, and cruel
as a branding iron
that threatens to burst from you
try to chant
but you can't
so you lie sometimes
play cool like you're only you
like you aren't inside
an outline he drew for you
if we are he inside us who else are we, too?
you don't you won't but i can't hold it against you
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3. |
interlude 2
00:22
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4. |
the baseball song
04:33
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call the game
when the rain
floods the field and drives the little league inside
folding chairs left behind
fill the van seats up and watch the melting sky
through the glass
do you recall
how it felt
when you swung and hit and everybody shout-
ed for you
filled with pride
round first base and pray the fielder drops the fly
call it foul
try again
before you outgrow
summer vacation
tear the stitch
split the sphere
rip the insides out, a sacrifice to find
but once you know
you can't go
back to playing pickup ball in the sunshine
that's over now
time to ask
if the core was built to last
chimpanzees
in a cage
throw their shit and swing their sticks become enraged
by the crowd
gatherin' round
so they pound their chests and kick the dirt in clouds
so far home
is this america?
i heard her shouting
heard her shouting, now
don't let anybody rain down on you from their cloud
i heard her laughing, heard her crying
kick and scream and shout
don't let anybody tell you they've figured it out
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5. |
interlude 3
00:14
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6. |
pickup art
04:15
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i see you pretty girl with your face hidden behind your cell phone
no guys are sitting close enough to you to convince me you're not here
all alone
and the room is getting dimmer and i'd swear to god you're starting to glow
your yawning says my odds are good and honey, hell, it just goes to show
i calculate my mosey as i overview the lie of your jeans
i gotta pick a pickup line you'll think is smart but still understand
what it means
i picked the line i used last time. it works as long as i'm not too keen
and keeps my real intentions clear, but never seen
if your daddy didn't love you
and left you empty except when he hurt you
my sense of smell is heightened and my lidless eyes can see in the dark
i share a hidden something known only to the missionaries. or, a shark.
you can draw your own conclusions as to what's enough and what went too far
but the odds are good i'll get whatever i want if you get in my car
if your daddy didn't love you
and left you empty except when he hurt you
and i want to say i'm sorry but i don't because that never quite works
never works
never works
it's the whiskey talking
cut your tongue out when it sins
it's laughable, i know, i've spent a lot of time in bed all alone
to tear myself apart about a broken heart or pickup art i never honed
when i felt you kiss my neck it took my breath until i took you away
and it taught us both the lesson everyone learns the next...
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7. |
interlude 4
00:48
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8. |
help me jc
03:46
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i went there for you
and left it for me
to be fair, to be free
the bottle never brought me back the car we drove is drowning in the sea
i went there for me
and left it for you
for trials, or truth
a couple bucks, a pack of smokes, a thousand nights to hit my spot on cue
so help me jesus, please be kind, 'cause lord i'm coming down
christ, you never call me back he smiled with his frown
help me jesus please be kind, 'cause lord i'm coming down
if i say the things
you think but don't say
would you betray
your inner thought that thoughts that lead to nothing lead to nothing but astray
so help me jesus, please be kind, i'll try and come around
christ, i want someone to hold when i am coming down
help me jesus, please be kind, 'cause lord i'm coming down
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9. |
interlude 5
00:26
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10. |
very real
07:20
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let
blood
leech the evil humors from inside
jenny called from harlem, and she says the therapy is working good
if she doesn't go back inside she's gonna kill herself, she said she would
because her mind
catches on fire
i just said that thing about the leeches because think
1000 years ago is as an hour to a blink
if jenny understood that it could drag her from the brink
before she sinks
i can't
grasp
how they went on living till they'd die
and knowing all the time, and getting sick and blind but going on with life
talking to themselves inside their heads and wandering without a guide
passing time
watching it fly
oh i know their ignorance won't absolve them their crimes
and they'd disdain the order we achieved inside our minds - i'm
only saying wait to cast your stones until you've tried
the Outside
une
due
twa cat sank sice
7-8-9
sometimes i get to ten before i gasp and resurface inside the the Hive
sometimes i sit for hours like a stranded man behind enemy lines
full of fear
and under fire
and when i'm out of Artificial and i'm sitting by myself
i can't help but realize why she'd want to hurt herself
sitting with your thoughts all alone in your room
in the gloom
of your personal tomb
put
the
art in artificial, laugh and cry
jenny shakes her head, leans away looks out the window with a sigh
i throw my cup of coffee at the wall and say it might work if you'd try
but her mind
catches on fire
and its not my job to put out fires or fix what can't be fixed
dripping down the drywall and a quiver in her lips
i swear this is the last time, plug back in and take my hit
and a chorus of gulls and the wide muted roar of the foam crested surf caressing the shore
and the water is violet and the sands neon green
with an updated whale patch and extra caffeine
in the air and a chair made of hands from the sand rise to greet me and ease me the seagulls
start singing my praises compliance is order and unity saves us so why do i sympathize with those we must leave behind?
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the man who fell in buffalo Portland, Oregon
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